The happy family! Well, Satomi's legs and me with my beautiful. Oh, how I miss them both.
Wednesday, 2 May 2007
Random pic
The happy family! Well, Satomi's legs and me with my beautiful. Oh, how I miss them both.
Visa? What Visa? Oooohhh, THAT one!
Yes... Visa, visa, visa. You know, there was a time not so long ago when I was genuinely confused as to what a credit card company had to do with being able to visit another country. Yep, it's true (although, i probably just let slip how worldly daft I once was). But now, the word visa brings up in my mind images of a hell filled with a million and one check-boxes, mountains and mountains of paper, and the never-ending search for a reliable Justice of the Peace to witness everything (does anyone else ever get nervous when presenting paper to JPs to sign... like, fearing the may not actually sign it for some arcane and bureaucratic reason??? No? Oh, it's just me then...)
The good news, however, is that we're a lot closer to actually getting it all sorted and submitted. Well, to be more correct in the reference to 'we' there - it's actually just me. Due to some strange twist of fate, I've been able to resist most procrastination-ary distractions and completed something relatively on time. Satomi, on the other hand, is slowly crumbling under the weight of her own beauracritic governmental system; which, I'm glad to say, seems as daft and devoid of logic as our own.
So what, precisely, are the hoops that Mr Australian Government is making us jump through in order to allow Satomi to live in Australia so that we can get married and live happily ever after? Well, as you can imagine, it all starts with a form. Oh no, not just one... one each! The forms are pretty standard Australian Government fair, apart from one particular question which struck me as a bit silly. "Q74 - Did you enter into this relationship with your partner solely to gain permanent residence in Australia?" Now, I know I'm not the quickest of wits, but I doubt anyone would be so flippant with this process to actually mark Yes to that question. But you never know, and it's worth the asking to weed out the particularly dim of our prospective Australian residents. Actually, it reminds me of a question we were told to ask when someone called the newspaper with a bomb threat after September 11: "Where are you right now? What is your full name and address?". I've never had the documentary evidence to prove it, but was reliably informed by the friendly HR manager administering that training session, that it sometimes works! Wow... the sophistication of the criminal mind, hey? But I digress...
So the form... Check. Well, actually no, not check. Haven't even looked through it, really. But it doesn't look that taxing.
Next up we have to prove our identities and residence status. Not as easy as it sounds... well, not for me. You see, I've never had a real birth certificate, just a birth certificate extract. Which did me well up until I need to get my passport (which I needed not only for this visa, but also my trip). So on the bold mission I went into my fist foray of Australian Government bureaucracy in order to gain all the necessary pieces of paper that tell me and other people that I actually exist. I won't bore you with all the details, but needless to say that it resulted in numerous requests to "provide additional information", and a number of fiery run ins with Australia Post workers. But, I have the A4 piece of encrypted paper stating that I was born, and fingers crossed, I will have the little blue booklet letting me cut the apron strings to the motherland in my hot little hands shortly.
Satomi is facing her own task, having to have the equivalent of her birth certificate (I think they call it a family register, or something like that) completely translated into English. In addition to this, she also has to prove she is of "good character and heath" in order to have the visa accepted. This involves getting police and medical checks done. Sounds simple when you put it like that, doesn't it? I can assure, it's nothing but easy. As we speak, paper work is flying back and forwards around Nippon as various government departments decide if Satomi is, indeed, "of good character".
In addition to all of that, we also have to prove that our relationship exists and is genuine. This is an absolutely awesome task and, at this moment, just a bundle of messed up papers sitting beside my desk. So far, we have gathered witness statements and identity documents (yes, apparently only Australian Residents are allowed to judge if Satomi is fit to be a fellow country-man) from 3 friends, with 2 more currently on the way. Along with a few Christmas and Engagement Cards sent to us, this should prove the "social aspects" part of the deal. We also have to have financial proof - so I have included bank statements from the joint account we opened in January, as well as money transfer receipts. We also have to show proof of the "nature of the household"... as Satomi and I lived together as flatmates before this amazing adventure began, this shouldn't be too hard, right? Oh no, it is. You see, I don't have a lease - well, nothing written down anyway. Just a gentleman's agreement between the landlord and I. Also, as Satomi was only going to be here for 9 months, we decided just to keep all the utilities bills in my name, to save the hassle. So, in actual fact, we have no hard evidence that Satomi and I actually lived together, apart from some odd bank statements that were sent to her here. To meet this requirement, I've secured a statement from the landlord confirming Satomi's existence at the Love Den, and his knowledge of our living arrangements. Also, a few people have mentioned our living arrangements in their statements to us. That should suffice... we hope.
Last part of the proving our relationship is showing evidence of our commitment to each other. This is hard - apart from the obvious proof of actually getting engaged and intending to be married... how do you "prove" this aspect? Apart from mentioning our future plans heavily in our History of the Relationship documents, we don't think we can do much more. Apart from attaching records of our nightly MSN chats, morning telephone calls and daily emails - this should prove that we've been in almost constant contact with each other since she left. There's plenty of all of those, so maybe the assessing officer will get a kick out of flicking through them, voyeuristically.
And that brings us nicely on to the next part of visa application. We both have to write our own "History of the Relationship". Satomi has already started on hers, but I am yet to. This is basically a written free-for-all where you can indulge your ego a little and wax lyrical about the events and feelings that have led to this momentous occasion (much like this blog, really). We're being all creative with this and adding heaps of photos and funny little stories from our times as flatmates and then as a couple. We'll also be attaching records from our trip to Byron Bay together in November, as well as records of my trip to Japan in August - this should show that we're serious. One thing does fill me with dread with this History part... I'm in two minds as to whether to be brutally honest in explaining how I proposed, or to embellish it a little? I proposed while we were lying in bed one morning on a lazy weekend morning... need spicing up, do you think?
And the final thing we need to do is prove that we're actually going to get married. I've now met with two marriage celebrants and have registered with one. So we have the Notice of Intent to Marry, as well as a letter from her confirming that she has been booked to do the wedding. Done.
Phew... I'm exhausted! And this is just for the application! Goodness knows how many more hoops they'll invent for us to jump through while they're assessing the application. In amongst this, we're also planning Ben's Big Adventure to Nippon (also titled Ben's Big First Overseas Journey). We've sort of delayed planning the wedding at this stage (by delayed, we've just stopped talking about it... there's waaaayyy too many things to do before that nut gets opened) and also some tentative plans for The Big Move to Melbourne, which we're hoping will happen close to the end of the Wedding Madness.
So thanks for reading, and I promise, we'll get to the good mushy romantic tales of how we sustain our relationship while being hemisphere's away from each other shortly. I promise - technology these days will have you flabbergasted! We've even had real "online" dates!!! Gone to gigs and the movies and everything.
But next time...
Love ya.
Ps - Oh, we're both doing fine. Although Satomi's got a cold at the moment, but is enjoying the week long bludge-fest Japanese-style, which is also called Golden Week (basically a week of public holidays back to back... not even us legendary public holiday bludgers here in Oz are that genius... yet!)
The good news, however, is that we're a lot closer to actually getting it all sorted and submitted. Well, to be more correct in the reference to 'we' there - it's actually just me. Due to some strange twist of fate, I've been able to resist most procrastination-ary distractions and completed something relatively on time. Satomi, on the other hand, is slowly crumbling under the weight of her own beauracritic governmental system; which, I'm glad to say, seems as daft and devoid of logic as our own.
So what, precisely, are the hoops that Mr Australian Government is making us jump through in order to allow Satomi to live in Australia so that we can get married and live happily ever after? Well, as you can imagine, it all starts with a form. Oh no, not just one... one each! The forms are pretty standard Australian Government fair, apart from one particular question which struck me as a bit silly. "Q74 - Did you enter into this relationship with your partner solely to gain permanent residence in Australia?" Now, I know I'm not the quickest of wits, but I doubt anyone would be so flippant with this process to actually mark Yes to that question. But you never know, and it's worth the asking to weed out the particularly dim of our prospective Australian residents. Actually, it reminds me of a question we were told to ask when someone called the newspaper with a bomb threat after September 11: "Where are you right now? What is your full name and address?". I've never had the documentary evidence to prove it, but was reliably informed by the friendly HR manager administering that training session, that it sometimes works! Wow... the sophistication of the criminal mind, hey? But I digress...
So the form... Check. Well, actually no, not check. Haven't even looked through it, really. But it doesn't look that taxing.
Next up we have to prove our identities and residence status. Not as easy as it sounds... well, not for me. You see, I've never had a real birth certificate, just a birth certificate extract. Which did me well up until I need to get my passport (which I needed not only for this visa, but also my trip). So on the bold mission I went into my fist foray of Australian Government bureaucracy in order to gain all the necessary pieces of paper that tell me and other people that I actually exist. I won't bore you with all the details, but needless to say that it resulted in numerous requests to "provide additional information", and a number of fiery run ins with Australia Post workers. But, I have the A4 piece of encrypted paper stating that I was born, and fingers crossed, I will have the little blue booklet letting me cut the apron strings to the motherland in my hot little hands shortly.
Satomi is facing her own task, having to have the equivalent of her birth certificate (I think they call it a family register, or something like that) completely translated into English. In addition to this, she also has to prove she is of "good character and heath" in order to have the visa accepted. This involves getting police and medical checks done. Sounds simple when you put it like that, doesn't it? I can assure, it's nothing but easy. As we speak, paper work is flying back and forwards around Nippon as various government departments decide if Satomi is, indeed, "of good character".
In addition to all of that, we also have to prove that our relationship exists and is genuine. This is an absolutely awesome task and, at this moment, just a bundle of messed up papers sitting beside my desk. So far, we have gathered witness statements and identity documents (yes, apparently only Australian Residents are allowed to judge if Satomi is fit to be a fellow country-man) from 3 friends, with 2 more currently on the way. Along with a few Christmas and Engagement Cards sent to us, this should prove the "social aspects" part of the deal. We also have to have financial proof - so I have included bank statements from the joint account we opened in January, as well as money transfer receipts. We also have to show proof of the "nature of the household"... as Satomi and I lived together as flatmates before this amazing adventure began, this shouldn't be too hard, right? Oh no, it is. You see, I don't have a lease - well, nothing written down anyway. Just a gentleman's agreement between the landlord and I. Also, as Satomi was only going to be here for 9 months, we decided just to keep all the utilities bills in my name, to save the hassle. So, in actual fact, we have no hard evidence that Satomi and I actually lived together, apart from some odd bank statements that were sent to her here. To meet this requirement, I've secured a statement from the landlord confirming Satomi's existence at the Love Den, and his knowledge of our living arrangements. Also, a few people have mentioned our living arrangements in their statements to us. That should suffice... we hope.
Last part of the proving our relationship is showing evidence of our commitment to each other. This is hard - apart from the obvious proof of actually getting engaged and intending to be married... how do you "prove" this aspect? Apart from mentioning our future plans heavily in our History of the Relationship documents, we don't think we can do much more. Apart from attaching records of our nightly MSN chats, morning telephone calls and daily emails - this should prove that we've been in almost constant contact with each other since she left. There's plenty of all of those, so maybe the assessing officer will get a kick out of flicking through them, voyeuristically.
And that brings us nicely on to the next part of visa application. We both have to write our own "History of the Relationship". Satomi has already started on hers, but I am yet to. This is basically a written free-for-all where you can indulge your ego a little and wax lyrical about the events and feelings that have led to this momentous occasion (much like this blog, really). We're being all creative with this and adding heaps of photos and funny little stories from our times as flatmates and then as a couple. We'll also be attaching records from our trip to Byron Bay together in November, as well as records of my trip to Japan in August - this should show that we're serious. One thing does fill me with dread with this History part... I'm in two minds as to whether to be brutally honest in explaining how I proposed, or to embellish it a little? I proposed while we were lying in bed one morning on a lazy weekend morning... need spicing up, do you think?
And the final thing we need to do is prove that we're actually going to get married. I've now met with two marriage celebrants and have registered with one. So we have the Notice of Intent to Marry, as well as a letter from her confirming that she has been booked to do the wedding. Done.
Phew... I'm exhausted! And this is just for the application! Goodness knows how many more hoops they'll invent for us to jump through while they're assessing the application. In amongst this, we're also planning Ben's Big Adventure to Nippon (also titled Ben's Big First Overseas Journey). We've sort of delayed planning the wedding at this stage (by delayed, we've just stopped talking about it... there's waaaayyy too many things to do before that nut gets opened) and also some tentative plans for The Big Move to Melbourne, which we're hoping will happen close to the end of the Wedding Madness.
So thanks for reading, and I promise, we'll get to the good mushy romantic tales of how we sustain our relationship while being hemisphere's away from each other shortly. I promise - technology these days will have you flabbergasted! We've even had real "online" dates!!! Gone to gigs and the movies and everything.
But next time...
Love ya.
Ps - Oh, we're both doing fine. Although Satomi's got a cold at the moment, but is enjoying the week long bludge-fest Japanese-style, which is also called Golden Week (basically a week of public holidays back to back... not even us legendary public holiday bludgers here in Oz are that genius... yet!)
Thursday, 22 March 2007
The months are now flying by...
We celebrated another little milestone today... our minus one year wedding anniversary! In exactly one year, we will finally be a married couple! I'll have a wife! She'll have a husband! Scary stuff... but not really.
We've been apart for nearly 2 months now, and while it's still hard to be separated, day to day life is kind of getting to normal again. We're both settling into our relationship via the internet (bless MSN and webcams!) and we're getting to the business end of the visa application.
For those who've never been involved in visa applications, I'll give you a quick run down of what we're doing. We're applying for a Prospect to Marry Visa first: this means Satomi can enter Australia to marry me, as long as it's done in 9 months (the Visa's only valid for 9 months). As soon as we're married, we apply for a Spouse Visa. The Spouse Visa will apply for 2 years, before we are re-assessed and, if it's all still cool with Mr. Australian Government, Satomi gets a Temporary Permanent Resident Visa ("Temporary Permanent"??? Yeah... oxymoron is not a term the Gov is familiar with!). Then (still with us?) after 2 or 4 years, she will be allowed to be a Permanent Resident... I'm not sure when she will be allowed to become a citizen (if she even wants to, that is).
But anyway... that's ages down the track. Right now, we're focussed on the Prospect to Marry Visa. It's a rather involved and detailed process - but basically in addition to proving that we actually exist, and filling out all the correct forms and stuff, we also have to prove that our relationship is real and legitimate. Which, in itself, is a huge task.
Let me break it down for you. They are primarily interested in 4 key areas of our relationship that we have to prove: financial aspects; the nature of the household; the social context of the relationship; and our commitment to each other. Each area has to be supported by documentation, not just statements. We're working on them now, with a view to having all the paperwork ready to go by the end of April (ish?). It may also explain why I've been bugging some of you to send us Engagement Cards, filling out Statutory Declarations and such. Every little bit helps!
Of course, we have to also have a wedding planned. Which I am attempting to start in the midst of all this mayhem. I visited a celebrant last week, but we're not sure if we'll book her yet (she seems a bit expensive). I've also begun preparations for booking the place for the ceremony and reception (well... I'll be honest... "begun preparations" means I've been thinking about it... not much action, yet!). For those who need to plan their social lives one year in advance (and who think they're going to be invited!) we're planning on Saturday, March 22. I'm trying to convince Satomi of an early morning wedding, followed by a light brunch and some serious day-time drinking... how do you think my chances are? Luckily for me, we're both on the same page about what type of wedding we want: simple, no fuss, no worries. Basically, a quick beautiful ceremony, followed by some serious bonding with our chosen close friends and family. Unfortunately for reasons out of their control, Satomi's parents won't be able to make it - but her brother and sister, as well as her grandma are hoping to be here. Which should be really sweet.
Actually, while I'm on weddings, I have found some interesting facts about our commercialised world. One: when you register your details on a wedding website - don't ever put your real street address down! Within days of registering, my mailbox was literally overflowing with brochures, booklets, cards... basically paper products made into every concievable shape and size with pretty pictures and the "hard sell" labelled all over them (thanks soooo much, my darling Satomi!). Two - it's surprisingly simple to book a section of our "public parks" for a private function. Which in this case, I'm really pleased about... but don't get me talking about the philosophy of public places and how they're readily allowed to be screened off for private purposes. Three: I have no idea what an engagement ring is and how it differs from other rings. Sure, I know what a wedding band is and how that's fundamentally different... but how is an engagement ring different from a normal ring? And don't say price - that's obvious! And I don't think it's necessarily because I'm a guy... even most girls I've asked haven't been able to tell me.
So anyway, that's sort of where we're at right now. We're fairly well down the track of getting everything sorted for the visa. We've begun thinking about the wedding in a specific sense, and my trip to Japan in August is looming large (hopefully with the help of an SMS promotion through the new mX newspaper in Brisbane offering the chance to win a flight for 2 to Osaka! Fingers crossed!!!). Our relationship is actually strengthening, even through this physical separation. Not to make you all sickly or anything, but we're so in love that it makes me the happiest person on earth sometimes. And we seemed to have come out of our recent very tough predicament still together and close... I feel we'll be able to survive anything now.
Anyway... thanks for reading. Thanks for caring and thanks for your love and support so far. And as you probably know from reading the above... you'll all be needed in the weeks and months to come, I can assure you!
Love,
Ben
We've been apart for nearly 2 months now, and while it's still hard to be separated, day to day life is kind of getting to normal again. We're both settling into our relationship via the internet (bless MSN and webcams!) and we're getting to the business end of the visa application.
For those who've never been involved in visa applications, I'll give you a quick run down of what we're doing. We're applying for a Prospect to Marry Visa first: this means Satomi can enter Australia to marry me, as long as it's done in 9 months (the Visa's only valid for 9 months). As soon as we're married, we apply for a Spouse Visa. The Spouse Visa will apply for 2 years, before we are re-assessed and, if it's all still cool with Mr. Australian Government, Satomi gets a Temporary Permanent Resident Visa ("Temporary Permanent"??? Yeah... oxymoron is not a term the Gov is familiar with!). Then (still with us?) after 2 or 4 years, she will be allowed to be a Permanent Resident... I'm not sure when she will be allowed to become a citizen (if she even wants to, that is).
But anyway... that's ages down the track. Right now, we're focussed on the Prospect to Marry Visa. It's a rather involved and detailed process - but basically in addition to proving that we actually exist, and filling out all the correct forms and stuff, we also have to prove that our relationship is real and legitimate. Which, in itself, is a huge task.
Let me break it down for you. They are primarily interested in 4 key areas of our relationship that we have to prove: financial aspects; the nature of the household; the social context of the relationship; and our commitment to each other. Each area has to be supported by documentation, not just statements. We're working on them now, with a view to having all the paperwork ready to go by the end of April (ish?). It may also explain why I've been bugging some of you to send us Engagement Cards, filling out Statutory Declarations and such. Every little bit helps!
Of course, we have to also have a wedding planned. Which I am attempting to start in the midst of all this mayhem. I visited a celebrant last week, but we're not sure if we'll book her yet (she seems a bit expensive). I've also begun preparations for booking the place for the ceremony and reception (well... I'll be honest... "begun preparations" means I've been thinking about it... not much action, yet!). For those who need to plan their social lives one year in advance (and who think they're going to be invited!) we're planning on Saturday, March 22. I'm trying to convince Satomi of an early morning wedding, followed by a light brunch and some serious day-time drinking... how do you think my chances are? Luckily for me, we're both on the same page about what type of wedding we want: simple, no fuss, no worries. Basically, a quick beautiful ceremony, followed by some serious bonding with our chosen close friends and family. Unfortunately for reasons out of their control, Satomi's parents won't be able to make it - but her brother and sister, as well as her grandma are hoping to be here. Which should be really sweet.
Actually, while I'm on weddings, I have found some interesting facts about our commercialised world. One: when you register your details on a wedding website - don't ever put your real street address down! Within days of registering, my mailbox was literally overflowing with brochures, booklets, cards... basically paper products made into every concievable shape and size with pretty pictures and the "hard sell" labelled all over them (thanks soooo much, my darling Satomi!). Two - it's surprisingly simple to book a section of our "public parks" for a private function. Which in this case, I'm really pleased about... but don't get me talking about the philosophy of public places and how they're readily allowed to be screened off for private purposes. Three: I have no idea what an engagement ring is and how it differs from other rings. Sure, I know what a wedding band is and how that's fundamentally different... but how is an engagement ring different from a normal ring? And don't say price - that's obvious! And I don't think it's necessarily because I'm a guy... even most girls I've asked haven't been able to tell me.
So anyway, that's sort of where we're at right now. We're fairly well down the track of getting everything sorted for the visa. We've begun thinking about the wedding in a specific sense, and my trip to Japan in August is looming large (hopefully with the help of an SMS promotion through the new mX newspaper in Brisbane offering the chance to win a flight for 2 to Osaka! Fingers crossed!!!). Our relationship is actually strengthening, even through this physical separation. Not to make you all sickly or anything, but we're so in love that it makes me the happiest person on earth sometimes. And we seemed to have come out of our recent very tough predicament still together and close... I feel we'll be able to survive anything now.
Anyway... thanks for reading. Thanks for caring and thanks for your love and support so far. And as you probably know from reading the above... you'll all be needed in the weeks and months to come, I can assure you!
Love,
Ben
Sunday, 18 February 2007
It’s our 3 month anniversary today. Wow, only 3 months? We were just marvelling at it while chatting on MSN. It feels much, much longer than that, to both of us.
You can sort of understand why it feels longer though – in the space of 3 months, we have developed and cemented our relationship to one that is strong and that has already survived a couple of tough times.
For those who don’t know – I’ll give you a little snapshot of who we are. I am Ben, I’ve just turned 30 years old, and I’m from Brisbane, Australia. Satomi has just turned 33 and is originally from Inami, Japan. We met on cyberspace just briefly through my best mate, Steve, who lived in Japan for 3 years. Satomi decided to study English in Australia, choosing Brisbane to be close to her best mate Catherine. Steve introduced us and suggested Satomi move into my spare room for the 10 months or so she was planning to be here.
So April 2006 came, and Satomi became a co-lover in the Albion Love Den (my place – long story), along with my large-headed cat Potsie. The first few months saw us bond over food, crappy 80s music and long drunken talk fests in the Love Den. The cultural and social difficulties meant we surfed a ‘tolerance’ friendship, which developed in time to a deep, close connection. Pretty soon, our social lives became entwined, with each of us being the ‘plus one’ for the others’ parties, barbecues and drinking sessions. It was inevitable, but I developed a crush on her.
I tried to suppress the feeling, not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable in her short time in Brisbane. One day, she began to tell me about a couple of dates she’d been on recently… and it was hurting me to hear about them. It was then that I realised my ‘crush’ was something more. A period of trying to deny my feelings followed, before I could hold it in no longer and told her how I felt. It wasn’t immediately reciprocated, but within a couple of weeks, we were going out on a ‘date’ (how do you go out on a date when you live together already?). While the period afterwards was a bit of a blur of stolen glances, meaningful gestures and trying to also be ‘normal’ flatmates, we decided that November 17 would be the official beginning of our relationship.
We knew each other so well, and connected so deeply right from the start, that it was a matter of weeks before we recognised that we were actually in love with each other. That quickly developed into a realisation that we were each other’s ‘one’. We knew we felt the same about life, about the world, about where we wanted to go in life. And, after a couple of blissful months, I proposed. She accepted, gleefully, and we set about planning the rest of our lives together.
Everything would be perfect now, apart from one small problem. Her student visa expired on January 22, 2007. She had to go back to Japan! And 3 weeks ago tomorrow, I watched her beauty disappear down the escalator at the Brisbane International Airport, and out of my life (physically) for the next 8 months. We decided that the time spent apart would be spent focussing on her coming back – applying for a Prospect to Marry Visa.
The timeline is long and involved, but essentially Satomi will be back in Australia in September 2007, and we will be married early in 2008. The time between now and then is spent developing a long distance relationship – thanks to email, MSN chat, webcams and internet phones (so cheap!). While we’re sort of getting used to it now, the initial couple of days were, as you can expect, absolute torture – I’ll let Satomi take up the story for the 2 days immediately after her departure…
Ben
17 February, 2007.
You can sort of understand why it feels longer though – in the space of 3 months, we have developed and cemented our relationship to one that is strong and that has already survived a couple of tough times.
For those who don’t know – I’ll give you a little snapshot of who we are. I am Ben, I’ve just turned 30 years old, and I’m from Brisbane, Australia. Satomi has just turned 33 and is originally from Inami, Japan. We met on cyberspace just briefly through my best mate, Steve, who lived in Japan for 3 years. Satomi decided to study English in Australia, choosing Brisbane to be close to her best mate Catherine. Steve introduced us and suggested Satomi move into my spare room for the 10 months or so she was planning to be here.
So April 2006 came, and Satomi became a co-lover in the Albion Love Den (my place – long story), along with my large-headed cat Potsie. The first few months saw us bond over food, crappy 80s music and long drunken talk fests in the Love Den. The cultural and social difficulties meant we surfed a ‘tolerance’ friendship, which developed in time to a deep, close connection. Pretty soon, our social lives became entwined, with each of us being the ‘plus one’ for the others’ parties, barbecues and drinking sessions. It was inevitable, but I developed a crush on her.
I tried to suppress the feeling, not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable in her short time in Brisbane. One day, she began to tell me about a couple of dates she’d been on recently… and it was hurting me to hear about them. It was then that I realised my ‘crush’ was something more. A period of trying to deny my feelings followed, before I could hold it in no longer and told her how I felt. It wasn’t immediately reciprocated, but within a couple of weeks, we were going out on a ‘date’ (how do you go out on a date when you live together already?). While the period afterwards was a bit of a blur of stolen glances, meaningful gestures and trying to also be ‘normal’ flatmates, we decided that November 17 would be the official beginning of our relationship.
We knew each other so well, and connected so deeply right from the start, that it was a matter of weeks before we recognised that we were actually in love with each other. That quickly developed into a realisation that we were each other’s ‘one’. We knew we felt the same about life, about the world, about where we wanted to go in life. And, after a couple of blissful months, I proposed. She accepted, gleefully, and we set about planning the rest of our lives together.
Everything would be perfect now, apart from one small problem. Her student visa expired on January 22, 2007. She had to go back to Japan! And 3 weeks ago tomorrow, I watched her beauty disappear down the escalator at the Brisbane International Airport, and out of my life (physically) for the next 8 months. We decided that the time spent apart would be spent focussing on her coming back – applying for a Prospect to Marry Visa.
The timeline is long and involved, but essentially Satomi will be back in Australia in September 2007, and we will be married early in 2008. The time between now and then is spent developing a long distance relationship – thanks to email, MSN chat, webcams and internet phones (so cheap!). While we’re sort of getting used to it now, the initial couple of days were, as you can expect, absolute torture – I’ll let Satomi take up the story for the 2 days immediately after her departure…
Ben
17 February, 2007.
The parting - Satomi's travel diary
21st January 07
Woke up the 10th morning as fiancée, and it was the day I had to leave my fiancé behind.
I had a kind of strange, complicated feeling which couldn’t describe properly. Finally the day was here – but I didn’t want to get up from the warm bed. At 6:30 I was up - took shower, put my make-up on, dried my hair, and packed everything (eventually). Steve showed up, Blair was the driver to the airport. I was hoping my suitcase was less than 20kg and said a temporary ‘good bye’ to the Albion Love Den.
“Thanks for having me for almost 9 months.”
Surprisingly, it only took me 20 minutes to get to the check-in counter. Catherine rang me that they are coming to see me off at the airport soon. Dragging my luggage to the counter, it was 19.4kg… phew! Ben walked back towards me with the Cosmo magazine in his hand, and a card was inside it…sweet. I knew that I’d be reading it with tears in my eyes. Catherine and Mao che arrived at the airport, and she gave me a beautiful present.
Then over the loud speaker came the boarding call for CI0054. At last, finally, it was time to say: “see you later for a while”, I “much appreciated” everyone there, and after a big hug and kiss to Ben, I had to go downstairs and through the Customs and security check. Gate 81 was right there, so I decided to sit in front of it and opened the gift from Catherine - a book about weddings, with a lovely message. Then I unsealed a silver envelope and opened a card - as soon as I looked at his handwriting, I felt it was full of love from all his heart. I had to stop reading to wipe my eyes once before finishing reading. We know we are so important to each other for the rest of our lives, which makes me step forward strongly and feel that I’m doing right thing.
Unfortunately the flight was delayed almost an hour. Eventually I got on the plane and found my seat next a lovely lady who was going on a holiday to the Philippines. On the plane were personal screens right in front of everyone’s seats, and it was quite high-tech - it took me a while to figure out how to use it. I watched half of “The Queen”, slept and started “Umi zaru”; Japanese one, arriving in Taipei halfway through “Superman Returns”.
It was raining and already dim at 5:30pm. The lady sitting next to me and I decided to go to the hotel together. We both wanted to go to the city - she wanted to shop, I wanted to meet up with my friends. But the hotel ( Miramar Golf Country Club) was a long way from the city and public transport, and a taxi was too expensive. Moreover, there was no internet connection and phone line as they said they were under construction, so that I couldn’t contact my Taiwanese friend, Jerry. As a result, we had a dinner at the hotel restaurant which was included the plane ticket.
After dinner, I went back to my huge quiet twin room, tried to call my fiancé, obviously it didn’t work. As the night became a bit chilly, I had a hot bubble bath to make me warm and relax, which was really good. But I wasn’t that tired or sleepy, so I turned my computer to play some music.
I went to sleep into a double-size cold bed at about mid night, hoped to dream about my great love, who is thousands of kilometers away from where I was.
22nd January 07
When I woke up for toilet, it was 20 minutes before the wake up call I’d booked. The call came and I was told to come down for a bus, which leaves for the airport at 6:30! I tried to have a quick shower, but the hot water came from an old shower head and it was hitting me hard. I wanted to have the breakfast which was also included; I ate a bread roll, scrambled egg and bacon with orange juice. I was the last person to jump on the mini-bus from the hotel - everyone was waiting for me!
We arrived at Terminal 1 in Taipei International Airport at 7ish. I looked for my flight on the departure-notice board thing (I don’t know what it’s called - the huge board), but I couldn’t find it. I asked at information desk, then found out CI 0156 to Osaka leaves from Terminal 2 and I have to take a shuttle bus there.
Then I thought I had enough time to make a phone call to my fiancé in Brisbane, coz I hadn’t talked to him for so long. I had to buy a new phone card, since I lost the one I bought the previous night. I pressed his mobile number – no answer. Then I realized that I didn’t note his landline number! Finally, I found it on my computer and I was able to reach him. I felt so relieved and really wanted to hear his voice - I missed him so much… I talked to him with tears in my voice. After a quick 3min talk, I had to rush to get to Terminal 2 - it was nearly 7:55am. My flight was 8:55am, hurried to check in and left my suitcase, I ran to Gate D4.
As I promised to call Ben back earlier, I spoke to him a little longer again, then I rang to apologize to Jerry, who was expecting to see me the night before. As soon as I got on the plane, I was asked to change my seat twice! Anyway, the flight to Osaka was only one hour and fifty minutes. I had chicken pasta with Heineken while I was watching “Superman Returns” which I couldn’t finish at the 1st flight. We arrived in Osaka to sunny weather (but a bit chilly). Surprisingly, I didn’t have any strange feeling coming back to Japan, I felt like I was coming back from a holiday. I sat down on the bench taking out a green jacket from my suitcase; in addition, turned on the computer to see if Ben was online. Although it showed him on line, he didn’t respond on MSN. On the other hand, I saw 2 unopened emails from him, the one he wrote was when he got back from the airport, the other one was written about the 1st morning waking up without me. It was very hard to hide my tears in public, so I read them quickly, and closed them. I decided to email my sister, Asami, telling her what time I would arrive in Kanazawa instead of leaving a message on her mobile.
The express train ‘Haruka’ left at 1:46pm from Kansai Airport station, then I had to catch another train from Shin-Osaka station at 2:46pm - it was a smooth transfer train to train. The train travel to Kanazawa wasn’t too bad, which took just over 2.5 hours; it is kind of a wobbly local railway that gives me motion sickness. The train stopped at Kanazawa station at about 7:30, I was happy to see my sis waiting outside of the ticket gate. Putting my luggage into her red car, we drove away from the station and headed home.
After an hour drive, I saw my dad at the front door - smiling. The house hasn’t changed much, except for a tall sliver shiny stylish fridge and pearl-white less-used microwave in the kitchen. My mum came back in half an hour; she had already order take-way sushi for dinner; she cooked some warm soup, and we began the dinner without my brother (who went out for socializing with work people). We ate and talked - catching up on things; they liked their souvenirs. I ate a lot of sushi and had a Sapporo beer. After dinner, I tried to connect internet in my room, but it didn’t work; used a cable in the living room, it was connected with no problems. Finally, I caught Ben online started chatting and I couldn’t get it enough messaging him on MSN. I wanted to hear his voice, so we changed to talking on the phone, which was much better even though his voice sounded differently - not as sexy as his usual voice, but I still loved talking to him. The time talking to your lover flies so quickly, he had to go to bed soon. I hate the moment that I have to hang up the phone or finish talking with him. This was the first night I came home to Toyama. I just keep on thinking there are (only) another 8 months until I get to see my fiancé and to be in his arms.
Satomi
Woke up the 10th morning as fiancée, and it was the day I had to leave my fiancé behind.
I had a kind of strange, complicated feeling which couldn’t describe properly. Finally the day was here – but I didn’t want to get up from the warm bed. At 6:30 I was up - took shower, put my make-up on, dried my hair, and packed everything (eventually). Steve showed up, Blair was the driver to the airport. I was hoping my suitcase was less than 20kg and said a temporary ‘good bye’ to the Albion Love Den.
“Thanks for having me for almost 9 months.”
Surprisingly, it only took me 20 minutes to get to the check-in counter. Catherine rang me that they are coming to see me off at the airport soon. Dragging my luggage to the counter, it was 19.4kg… phew! Ben walked back towards me with the Cosmo magazine in his hand, and a card was inside it…sweet. I knew that I’d be reading it with tears in my eyes. Catherine and Mao che arrived at the airport, and she gave me a beautiful present.
Then over the loud speaker came the boarding call for CI0054. At last, finally, it was time to say: “see you later for a while”, I “much appreciated” everyone there, and after a big hug and kiss to Ben, I had to go downstairs and through the Customs and security check. Gate 81 was right there, so I decided to sit in front of it and opened the gift from Catherine - a book about weddings, with a lovely message. Then I unsealed a silver envelope and opened a card - as soon as I looked at his handwriting, I felt it was full of love from all his heart. I had to stop reading to wipe my eyes once before finishing reading. We know we are so important to each other for the rest of our lives, which makes me step forward strongly and feel that I’m doing right thing.
Unfortunately the flight was delayed almost an hour. Eventually I got on the plane and found my seat next a lovely lady who was going on a holiday to the Philippines. On the plane were personal screens right in front of everyone’s seats, and it was quite high-tech - it took me a while to figure out how to use it. I watched half of “The Queen”, slept and started “Umi zaru”; Japanese one, arriving in Taipei halfway through “Superman Returns”.
It was raining and already dim at 5:30pm. The lady sitting next to me and I decided to go to the hotel together. We both wanted to go to the city - she wanted to shop, I wanted to meet up with my friends. But the hotel ( Miramar Golf Country Club) was a long way from the city and public transport, and a taxi was too expensive. Moreover, there was no internet connection and phone line as they said they were under construction, so that I couldn’t contact my Taiwanese friend, Jerry. As a result, we had a dinner at the hotel restaurant which was included the plane ticket.
After dinner, I went back to my huge quiet twin room, tried to call my fiancé, obviously it didn’t work. As the night became a bit chilly, I had a hot bubble bath to make me warm and relax, which was really good. But I wasn’t that tired or sleepy, so I turned my computer to play some music.
I went to sleep into a double-size cold bed at about mid night, hoped to dream about my great love, who is thousands of kilometers away from where I was.
22nd January 07
When I woke up for toilet, it was 20 minutes before the wake up call I’d booked. The call came and I was told to come down for a bus, which leaves for the airport at 6:30! I tried to have a quick shower, but the hot water came from an old shower head and it was hitting me hard. I wanted to have the breakfast which was also included; I ate a bread roll, scrambled egg and bacon with orange juice. I was the last person to jump on the mini-bus from the hotel - everyone was waiting for me!
We arrived at Terminal 1 in Taipei International Airport at 7ish. I looked for my flight on the departure-notice board thing (I don’t know what it’s called - the huge board), but I couldn’t find it. I asked at information desk, then found out CI 0156 to Osaka leaves from Terminal 2 and I have to take a shuttle bus there.
Then I thought I had enough time to make a phone call to my fiancé in Brisbane, coz I hadn’t talked to him for so long. I had to buy a new phone card, since I lost the one I bought the previous night. I pressed his mobile number – no answer. Then I realized that I didn’t note his landline number! Finally, I found it on my computer and I was able to reach him. I felt so relieved and really wanted to hear his voice - I missed him so much… I talked to him with tears in my voice. After a quick 3min talk, I had to rush to get to Terminal 2 - it was nearly 7:55am. My flight was 8:55am, hurried to check in and left my suitcase, I ran to Gate D4.
As I promised to call Ben back earlier, I spoke to him a little longer again, then I rang to apologize to Jerry, who was expecting to see me the night before. As soon as I got on the plane, I was asked to change my seat twice! Anyway, the flight to Osaka was only one hour and fifty minutes. I had chicken pasta with Heineken while I was watching “Superman Returns” which I couldn’t finish at the 1st flight. We arrived in Osaka to sunny weather (but a bit chilly). Surprisingly, I didn’t have any strange feeling coming back to Japan, I felt like I was coming back from a holiday. I sat down on the bench taking out a green jacket from my suitcase; in addition, turned on the computer to see if Ben was online. Although it showed him on line, he didn’t respond on MSN. On the other hand, I saw 2 unopened emails from him, the one he wrote was when he got back from the airport, the other one was written about the 1st morning waking up without me. It was very hard to hide my tears in public, so I read them quickly, and closed them. I decided to email my sister, Asami, telling her what time I would arrive in Kanazawa instead of leaving a message on her mobile.
The express train ‘Haruka’ left at 1:46pm from Kansai Airport station, then I had to catch another train from Shin-Osaka station at 2:46pm - it was a smooth transfer train to train. The train travel to Kanazawa wasn’t too bad, which took just over 2.5 hours; it is kind of a wobbly local railway that gives me motion sickness. The train stopped at Kanazawa station at about 7:30, I was happy to see my sis waiting outside of the ticket gate. Putting my luggage into her red car, we drove away from the station and headed home.
After an hour drive, I saw my dad at the front door - smiling. The house hasn’t changed much, except for a tall sliver shiny stylish fridge and pearl-white less-used microwave in the kitchen. My mum came back in half an hour; she had already order take-way sushi for dinner; she cooked some warm soup, and we began the dinner without my brother (who went out for socializing with work people). We ate and talked - catching up on things; they liked their souvenirs. I ate a lot of sushi and had a Sapporo beer. After dinner, I tried to connect internet in my room, but it didn’t work; used a cable in the living room, it was connected with no problems. Finally, I caught Ben online started chatting and I couldn’t get it enough messaging him on MSN. I wanted to hear his voice, so we changed to talking on the phone, which was much better even though his voice sounded differently - not as sexy as his usual voice, but I still loved talking to him. The time talking to your lover flies so quickly, he had to go to bed soon. I hate the moment that I have to hang up the phone or finish talking with him. This was the first night I came home to Toyama. I just keep on thinking there are (only) another 8 months until I get to see my fiancé and to be in his arms.
Satomi
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